Bipolar Journey

Tom Cruise in the move, Jerry Mcquire, makes this acknowledgement, “Have you ever gotten the feeling that you aren’t completely embarassed yet, but you glimpse tomorrow’s embarrassment?” Well as a real person, he has certaintly had his share of embarassing moments.  So have I.  My embarassment stems from my inability to control my tongue, making a joke at the wrong moment, and being widly varied in moods. 

Bridesmaid luncheons can be a real treat as long as I am not the bridesmaid picking up the bill.  One such luncheon for me provided validation of the need for not saying everything that comes to mind and properly taking one’s medication.   Caught up in the business of a wedding, I got all mixed up on my meds.  Getting mixed up on my meds, generally means a trigger of one or more of my moods.  Foregoing sleep deemed itself necessary, so I skipped some of my meds in exchange for an increase in energy.  The day before the wedding came, so did the bridesmaid’s luncheon.  This very well-to-do family agreed to host the shower.  Now all us girls were young and let’s just say uneducated in the older ladies’ generation of luncheon etiquette.  When I say “older ladies,”  I mean ancient here.  Our “light” lunch consisted of some odd tasting chicken, a salad, and “Tomato Aspic.”  When my plate was put before me, I shut one eye to see if I was seeing straight.  The little blue haired ladies were diving into their meal and chattering on incessantly.  My fellow maids and even the bride, were all exchanging looks.  I tried the salad and there was no way I was getting that down, it had some kind of dressing that tasted like the gritty cough medicine I took as a child.  Then came the chicken, I am a semi-vegetarian so I only took a nibble.  I hadn’t eaten all day and knew that chicken was not going to sit well.  That left me with the Tomato Aspic.  I ate every disagreeable bite of that stuff. 

Now, my mouth gets me in trouble WITH medication.  WITHOUT medication, I need a muzzle.  My problem is I get to loud and say things at inappropriate times.  Thinking we were alone while the hostesses where tending to dessert, I say to my sister, “That tasted worse than the dog food you fed me when we were kids.”  She gave me that, “Shut-your-mouth-stupid” look and of course, I didn’t.  I had to announce it again to the whole table and added “What do you think is for dessert, a tart with mint tea?”  It grew quiet in the room and I could feel the presence of one of the blue hairs behind me.  In fact, I could smell the wild blossom perfume. 

Oops!  I quickly stumbled out an apology, shrank in my chair, and ate every bite of the creme-de-mint parfait.  I left feeling miserable.  I had no excuse for my behavior.  My stupid moods mixed with my personality and trouble occurred. The thing is I know there is a strong chance, this behavior will reoccur. My mixed state does not let me down when it comes to holding my tongue.  I did learn from the situation.  I should always take my meds and no matter what food someone puts before you, try to eat it and make no comments! Hopefully, it won’t be tomato aspic.